A futile search for perfection

I've been checking around and it looks like a lot of people have their knickers in a knot today. It's too bad we don't live in a perfect world.

In the U.S. Senate, the Democratic caucus voted to allow Joe Lieberman to retain his chairmanship of the Homeland Security Committee, a position he treasures more than life itself. Since Joe spent most of the fall on the road campaigning for Speedbump and badmouthing Barry, the jammie-wearers at Democratic Underground are having conniption fits over the vote. They're so mad they're using the F word and promising to hold breath until blue in face. I'd like to think there are shrewd political calculations that justify treating Lieberman better than he presumably deserves. Maybe, maybe not. In a perfect world, Joe would be humiliated in public until he fell to his knees in tearful supplication, begging for Dem forgiveness then devoting the remaining years of his Senate career to making Republican lives miserable.

On the economic front, the Big Three U.S. automakers have fallen upon hard times and are trying to game Congress into a multi-billion dollar bailout package. This has caused conservatives to have their own hissy fits. Unlike workers in financial institutions, workers in the automobile manufacturing industry belong to labor unions and therefore deserve to suffer in the minds of traditional conservatives like George Will. In a perfect world General Motors, Ford and Chrysler would merge into one huge super-efficient organization and start rolling out cars that would rival Volvo, Audi and BMW in terms of styling, performance, economy, and reliability, but sold at a fraction of the cost. Imagine an Audi S3 for around $16,500. That's in a perfect world, understand.

There are reports that Hillary Clinton will be offered the Secretary of State position in Barry's administration. This has panties wadded on both the left and right, although there are some liberals and conservatives who like the concept. My main problem with the idea is that it has a retro look, and I had my heart set on something shiny and new. Maybe I should give Barry the benefit of the doubt - maybe he knows what he's doing and definitely knows more than me. In a perfect world, Hillary could be assigned any important job in government and Bill would be required to stay in a closet and only come out for feeding twice a day.

Finally, the Wasilla Wondermom is apparently poised to join Joe the Plumber as a published author. The rumor is that WW will probably get seven million for her addition to the world's literary masterpieces. I've decided that Trig's mom has the potential to be like the other W: a 250 KB politician in a 500 GB job. Can you say system failure ? In a perfect world, Trig's mom would be like the hula hoop: a fad that flamed out and looked pretty damned silly in retrospect.

Added 8:10 pm, Tuesday

In a perfect world, convicted felon Ted Stevens would lose his election... never mind.