My latest sad story

Here's what life is like in my world: If I find a shady place to park in the summer, when I return to my car it'll be covered with bird shit. If I wash my car to remove the bird shit, it will rain. The cleaner I get my car, the sooner the rain will begin.

This week I went to a memorial service at our church, and the turnout was so large I had to park on a dirt lot under some shade trees. Sure enough, there were droppings on the hood and roof when I came out an hour later. Now my car and Mrs. bee's were both decorated with bird shit splatters.

We've been burning up in a drought lately, and my wife just fertilized the yard for summer. Since we desperately need rain, I devoted much of the day to giving both cars a thorough wash and vacuum, and spiffing them up with vinyl care, tire cleaner, even a partial wax job. Worked about three hours in the sun, which should produce rain within two days.

I was nearing the end of the car washing chore when I blinked the sunscreen on my cheeks into both eyes. That happens, which is why I try to avoid applying sunscreen to my face. Anyway, my eyes were still burning and watering when I went to the rack on the side of the house to hang up the hose, and I didn't notice the wasp nest being constructed on the underside of the hose rest. One of the little motherfuckers shot out and stung me below the right eye. I wish he hadn't. Anyway, it pissed me off and I exterminated the bastards in the time it took me to locate a can of spray.

We'd better get a good rainfall out of the deal, that's all I have to say.

Time changes and tumbles

Yesterday was the return to Central Standard Time, and I was roughly halfway through a three-mile walk when it got dark. It was daylight when I left the house, and for some reason it never entered my mind that it could get dark in the next thirty minutes or so.

At any rate, I was walking briskly and nearing home when I stumbled over some irregularity in the sidewalk's surface and took a spill. It wasn't as bad as the one I took around Christmas two years ago since I wasn't running at full speed, but I still ended up with painful scrapes on the palm of my left hand, my right thumb, and right knee. They're still bothering me this afternoon. Concrete sidewalks are as rigid and unforgiving as your typical Texas tea party voter.

I'm too damned old to be taking hard falls, and my instinctive tendency is to blame this one on the time change.

A moving experience

All factors considered, it is substantially easier to help your adult child move into her new house than it is to buy and move into a new house of your own. This is especially true when there are plenty of capable hands available to share in the division of labor.

Calories

My parents subscribe to a several magazines, most of which eventually wind up at my house in the recycling basket. I try to skim them for interesting articles before they're hauled to the recycle center, and I found an intriguing cover story in the August 17th issue of Time. According to their report, people who study the subject are concluding that exercise really doesn't have much to do with weight loss. In fact, heavy exercise may result in weight gains because it makes us hungrier, and most people tend to satisfy their hunger by scarfing down high-calorie snacks or beverages.


I was glad to read this since it confirmed something I'd already figured out on my own --- if I want to maintain my weight or lose a few pounds, it'll be accomplished mainly by watching my diet, not increasing my exercise level.


My primary form of exercise is walking three miles per day in as close to 45 minutes as I can make it. Walking at four miles per hour is fairly vigorous exercise, and at my age and weight, the activity will burn an average of 305 calories per day. To exercise off one pound, I have to walk approximately 35 miles without increasing my calorie intake. It can be done, but it isn't easy. There are many benefits to walking, but losing weight isn't among them.


I've reached a point where I feel guilty any day that I skip my walk, whether due to bad weather or travel, so I'll continue the routine, maybe even try to improve it. But I'll also continue my routine of counting the calories in the stuff I eat, and try to stay under 2200 a day, and under 1500 when I can.

Awesomeness

Saturday afternoon, the temperature was 94 degrees with a heat index of 99 degrees. I smeared sunscreen all over my face and arms, put on a straw hat instead of my usual cap, picked up my weights and headed out to walk three miles. Made it in 44:32 (4.042 mph). Awesome. It was the first time I'd broken the 4 mph barrier since the weather turned hot. Sunday, 96 degrees. Same routine: sunscreen, straw hat, etc. Got in at 44:19 (4.062 mph). More awesome.

Yesterday, I did yard work instead of walking. This afternoon, instead of waiting until 6:30 pm to start the walk, I decided to see what I could do when the sun was high enough that there was no shade along the route. Left the house at 2:00 pm, with the heat index 99 degrees, and turned in my best time yet, 43:58 (4.094 mph). Total awesomeness. Maybe it was the sunscreen or the straw hat, but my heat tolerance improved dramatically since last week. Hope I can maintain this level of awesomeness all summer long.

The other day, Obama adapted a line from the great guy flick The Untouchables, which has attracted attention and inspired commentary around the blogosphere; the Repubs are whining like sissy-boys about it. It's the line about bringing a gun to a knife fight. It was a damned cool line when Sean Connery said it, and it still is. Awesomeness.

Summertime blahs

When the aggregate readership of three blogs numbers in single digits, one critical remark sticks out like a sore thumb and two constitute a groundswell of negativity. This afternoon, I got an e-mail from one of my longtime buddies commenting on my relative lack of productivity in recent weeks, and implying that like an old mineshaft, I might be petering out.

As I mentioned in the preceding post, I got distracted at the beginning of May by my other interest; I have two. Blog maintenance is the focal point of my miserable existence, which is why there are three of them rather than one. The original blog, Hot Water Sandwich, is essentially dedicated to interminable reflections on the events of my life, starting with earliest memories. Fertilizer Storage is where I ventilate in short bursts about whatever's pissing me off at any given moment. The blog you're currently looking at, Pensights, is the middle stack where everything else goes.

Since I've been spending so much time on my other interest, I haven't been musing on the events of my life or keeping up with current events closely enough to get pissed off, hence the scarcity of new stuff.

Summertime has arrived, with the temperature this afternoon in the low 90s. I've hated summer ever since I was old enough to have summer jobs. When I was a teenager, my summer work was outdoors in cotton fields, slaving under the hot sun for 76 cents an hour or some similarly ridiculous wage. Once I got past junior high, summer stopped being a vacation time and started being a time when I worked real hard in the damned Texas heat. For years, I was grossly overweight which made the heat almost unbearable, plus I was psychologically disturbed by the whole concept of daylight saving time (as noted in an earlier post). The bottom line: Fuck summer.

A few years ago, for health reasons, I lost nearly 100 pounds. I started eating more wisely and trying to get a little exercise every day. There are many good things about being 100 pounds lighter, but one of the best is that it's easier to cope with the Texas summer heat.

My normal exercise consists of walking between 2.5 and 4.5 miles every day, at a speed of four miles per hour. Typically, I walk a measured three-mile route in 45 minutes (faster if the weather's nice). Every year when summer breaks down the door and comes charging in like it owns the joint, I experience an adjustment period; the three miles start taking 46 or 47 minutes instead. After a few days, I get accustomed to the heat and motivate as usual, but I still finish drenched in sweat. Oh well, it'll just help me appreciate the cooler afternoons in October.