Like the teabag parties on April 15th, the topic of Texas leaving the union continues to be driven by a small minority of people who need to get lives. Maybe they could go outside, get some sunshine for a change, meet a girl, sign up for some volunteer work. Do something besides cower in fear and obsess about their taxes.
I've been trying to imagine how life would be if the fantasies of the secessionists came to fruition. First, I suppose I'd be swept up in the massive migration of sane, intelligent people swarming across the border into Arkansas, Oklahoma, or New Mexico. Louisiana ? Probably not, since that would be like migrating to Alabama or Mississippi. I'd be able to experience firsthand what it feels like to be an illegal immigrant. The Okies would have to get serious about erecting border fences to keep the Texans from coming across and taking all the good jobs.
Would immigrants like me retain our U.S. citizenship, or would we have to fill out forms and start all over again ? Hmmm -- good question.
After all the intelligent people had migrated, what would be left would be vast empty areas with population pockets of dimwitted yahoos wondering why things didn't work anymore. All the Mexicans would head back across the Rio Grande, where there were possibilities for a better life.
Liberal do-gooders in Washington would begin drawing up plans for financial aid to keep Texans from starving and killing each other off, since those staying behind would be armed to the teeth and beyond the restraints of civilization. Republicans would start developing plans for an invasion and occupation to secure the Texas oilfields; troops would be returned from Afghanistan and placed in standby status.
Rick Perry, as incumbent governor, would be set for life since 99 percent of adult Texans would be people who voted for him twice before. The average IQ in the United States would increase by approximately 24 points.
And so it would be in the fantasy world of tomorrow.
Great stuff...:-)
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