According to the chatter I'm reading online, Hope Hicks is displaying COVID-19 symptoms, and Cheez Whiz and Melanoma have both tested positive. My first reaction was that this is White House bullshit designed to produce a pity bump in the polls after Cheezy's debate disaster earlier this week. My second thought was "Goddamn it, I hope Joe Biden hasn't been infected."
Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm skeptical any time "breaking news" is released by the Cheez Whiz team. Let's see if he demands that the election be postponed because he's taking some sick days.
If he's dead by November, I stand corrected.
Update 4:14 PM Friday: I went to bed a little after midnight having seen the preliminary reports that (A) Cheez Whiz was headed for two weeks of quarantine, then (B) he and the First Bimbo had tested positive. My gut feeling was that the most audacious scam he has ever attempted had just gotten underway. I began to mentally outline my blog post explaining in considerable detail why making a phony claim that he was testing positive for COVID-19 might actually be the best available solution to all those problems bombarding him now,
Hell, it may even win the election for him. As things stand today, if Cheezy and Biden split the undecided voters 50/50, then Joe wins the election in a blowout. On the other hand, if Cheezy can capture a significant majority of the undecideds, most of the tossup states fall into his lap. Any voters who are still undecided at this stage are probably so goddamned clueless they might vote for Cheezy out of pity/sympathy. That's his best case scenario. Cheezy's worst case scenario: He loses the election, but not because he's the worst so-called precedent (sic) ever. It's because he was on the verge of winning a second term when the "China Virus" forced him to abandon has campaign right before the election.
When I finished my morning walk, I discovered that my Internet connection was gone, presumably because the cable company was performing maintenance or repairs. Instead of catching up on the news, I was outside doing yard work instead for nearly three hours.
By the time my outdoor work was done, my cable service had been restored, and the first website I checked had a report that covered nearly every point I planned to cover in my own blog post.
That will save me having to type a few hundred words. Unlike electoral-vote.com, I'm going with the assumption that Cheezy's lying about testing positive, since lying to manipulate the media is what he does. If he gets sick and dies before election day, I'll say "Man, I really blew that one."
I doubt it'll come to that, though. I expect he'll emerge from quarantine, gloating because he proved that everything he claimed about the virus was correct. The White House will control virtually all of the information we get, and the natural tendency of media people is to accept whatever they're told as the truth. The Cheez Whiz followers will be so relieved that their around-the-clock prayers have been answered, they won't care that he "got sick" from a virus he told them was a hoax.
Update 5:48 PM Friday: This was totally predictable. Joe Biden, being a decent human being, is discontinuing his negative campaign ads against Cheez Whiz, according to Daily Kos.
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